Almost There

Great news! It looks like I'll be driving my truck, now dubbed The Sasquatch, on Monday! It is unbelievable how much I've learned through the process of replacing The Sasquatch engine, clutch and completing the numerous other repairs.

Through the weeks and hours I've discovered:

Into Mechanics

About mid-September or so, my truck basically died on me. And not just died, it blew up- in this case the engine literally blew up. And so for the last couple of months I've been carpooling and bicycling around. Since where I live it rains 9+ months out of the year, biking around isn't very... safe. Over the Christmas holiday one of my uncles donated a rebuilt engine to me. Thus beginning my journey into the mechanic realm.

Taking A Deeper Prespective

I used to design tattoos. I have a tattoo too and I love it. I have numerous friends with tattoos that are meaningful, beautiful, and little works of art. Tattoos are a way of expressing yourself. Many people get them for specific reasons or because they just like the piece. I am in fact not against tattoos, just to be clear. However, I resign from continuing to design them. Let me explain.

Results: Did I Make It?

Waking at 5:40 am instead makes things a little rough. I push myself awake. My room is freezing- apparently my room still doesn't receive any of the house's heat. In a blink I'm wide awake as the thought hits me, today is test day. Today is my BIG state exam, the two tests that determine whether or not I will be a Certified Nurses Assistant. Part of my stomach turns with the realization. The other part is still asleep, the desire to return to my warm cozy bed is tempting, but anxiety is beginning. Pray, I have to pray. After all God is with me, I just have to turn to Him. The anxiety lessens a little with the gentle reminder that whether or not I'm prepared doesn't matter, it comes down to whatever I have is all I'm going into the test with, I can't change the past.

Update!

It's been a while, I know! but I promise I have several illustrations/paintings to post really soon! Sorry about not keeping up with posting regularly. Things have been pretty dang busy. My truck's engine basically blew up, and no, I am NOT joking. I finished up my training class to become a Certified Nurses Assistant this last week and will be taking my state exam this Friday! (Both excited and terrified at the same time.) Also been party planning for several birthday celebrations. Did I mention preparing for Halloween?

To be honest, I'm not a fan of Halloween. Actually of ALL the holidays Halloween is my least favorite. I do not like dark, scary or evil things at all. And here in the US, Halloween seems to be all about dark scary things and watching movies that tend to focus on the evil. I don't like it. However I do like creating costumes! That is tons of fun! My best friend's little boy is a huge fan of superheros so we made him a Captain America costume. It has to be one of the coolest things I have ever sown. Actually considering how little I have sewn anything, it is the coolest thing by default. My best friend made a shield that I painted with spray paint, which is surprisingly more difficult than I expected. I created a Captain America T-Shirt and seriously contemplated making a larger one for some other people ahem...me, and lots more. The little boy LOVED it! Heck, I loved it! We are planning on making more costumes for the fella. It is just as fun for him to play in as it is for us to design and make.

I am also working on painting portraits of my family members from when they were little kids. There are five brothers and a sister-in-law plus my dad and mom. So there will be plenty of work to do for a while. I am hoping to have them finished by Christmas and make prints of them to give to everyone. Or for at least my parents. We will see.

Have a great night!

Career Advice

The most well-know successful business people all have something in common- they all are working out of their strengths. They found what they do well at and worked to do more of it. They learned how to network, delegate, problem solve, and use other people's strengths where they were personally weaker. I read a book once about this idea of building up a career based on knowing your strengths. The book even came with a code to take an online quiz that would help the reader pinpoint his or her own strengths.

Over the years I've taken several career aptitude tests, all of which recommended pursing a career in the arts or becoming a teacher. Oddly enough these past several months there have been people who have suggested that I look into becoming a Certified Nurses Assistant. As I talked to God about it and researched it, I came across a book that is a collection of writings by Mother Teresa. Ever been hit in the stomach so hard you couldn't breath for a moment? It was like that. Reading her words was similar to having light pour into my heart. God basically reached down and went, "this is what I want you to do." Being a CNA is in every way, no exaggeration, out of my comfort zone. Today was my first day of training and I'm going to be very honest, I was afraid to go.

One of the Hardest Month's Ever

This past month has been tumultuous. A college friend of mine was found about two weeks ago, shot to death at an intersection in his town. Yes, that is a true statement. It was horrible seeing the glaring words on my computer screen announcing his murder, "Young Man Found Dead In Car." Nothing prepares you for that kind of news. I broke down at work, sobbing behind closed doors. Two days later I quit. I had to, I just couldn't be there any more. I needed a mental vacation, I need to pursue something meaningful. Who knows when life will end? My friend was on his way home during his lunch break while working at a local care giving place. He never reached his wife that night... how can anyone wrap their head around such tragedy? I still can't imagine that he is actually gone.

Yesterday I also found out that my family friend and neighbor passed away on Tuesday. He has been struggling to fight against cancer. As a retired teacher, he spent some of his free time writing books and taking care of us kids when I was growing up. He and his wife always celebrated the holidays with us and teased us about our little crushes and relationships. They were and are our extended family. I saw them early this past summer, introducing them to my best friend and his little boy. I can't handle this so well. Please no one else go...

But thankfully new life is beginning too. Today my beloved friends, Loren and Charity, welcomed a little girl into this big old world of ours. I'm not one to say newborns are cute normally, but wow. This baby is truly beautiful. I smiled at the newly posted pictures of mom and child. Memories of people passing mingle with the sights of people arriving. Oh tears, are you from sadness or joy? I can't tell.